Wisdom from Wee Ones

I love being a mommy, and I take very seriously my responsibility to teach and train my children.  But sometimes, it seems like they teach me more than I teach them!  It's a beautiful system, this family business.  Here is some of the wisdom my little ones have all figured out (and I hope they never lose it!):

* To love unreservedly, and forgive readily
   These sweet children love through thick and thin, and aren't afraid or ashamed to show their affection whenever it occurs to them.  They show no prejudice in their love, and see value in everyone.  They are quick to forgive, when an apology is sincere (or even just because). 

* To embrace life
   Oh, to be a kid again, and get caught up in the current of life, instead of the slough of "responsibility" that burdens us as adults...Children just seem to know how to embrace the joy of life, and to find joy in unexpected places, which is something we adults (wrongly) sacrifice under the pretense of being more--umm--responsible.

This is "emptying the water out" of Jack's boots, haha.

* To not be limited by fear
   I am amazed, constantly, at how unafraid my kids are!  Whether it's making new friends or asking kids we don't know to share a toy or jumping off a high precipice, they face new and challenging situations as if they're exhilarating opportunities. They especially seem to have no concept of fearing what other people think, which is HUGE!

Jack will jump off anything, even a 7-ft-high jungle gym!

Safita's favorite thing is jumping into water, and swimming in water over her head.  These guys are fearless!

* To play & be silly
   Sometimes, it's really good for the soul to just goof off and do nothing but paint your hair blue, make silly faces, and laugh about funny noises!  I'm convinced that silliness is more than just silliness--it's healing and rejuvenating!

* To approach problems as a game rather than an annoyance
   Whenever they're faced with a problem, their first reaction is to find a solution; and if the solution can be a game, all the better.

* To dance, whenever you hear music of any kind
   Songs on the radio, cell phone ringtones, advertising jingles...all deserve a peppy little jig!  It adds a sparkle of fun to sometimes otherwise dull moments.

* To treat everyone in the world like they are dear friends
   This is Safita's forte.  Wherever we are, and almost whatever her mood, she will wave and say hi, smile, and blow kisses to everyone we see.  She'll interact with strangers like they're a most beloved family member, and just make people feel special and loved.  She definitely leaves a trail of people swooning over her adorable friendliness!  She definitely convicts me in this regard, because I tend to just mind my own business and avoid people I don't know; but her friendliness seems to strike a (perhaps subconscious) longing in the people we meet from day to day--a longing to be in community, to treat all people like our neighbors, to be love to everyone we see...

Safita, showing deep affection for cousins we barely ever see (sadly)!

* To not judge people based on petty things, and to assume the best of people
   I think this is just true of kid nature--they haven't learned to judge yet.  They make observations about the people and things they see, but don't make value judgments about it.  I hope we can encourage them in that, and not teach them otherwise.

* To overlook differences--and even appreciate them!
   I love how the cousins on both sides love playing with each other, regardless of huge age gaps. They're all interested in different things and are at different stages in their lives, but somehow, they always find a common ground for appreciating each other and having fun together.  It's very sweet. In my own experience, too, when I've opened myself to learn from people different from me, I always learn valuable lessons and am deepened as a person.  It seems, God made us different for a reason, and maybe the point of community is to be around all different kinds of people (instead of a handful of people just like us) so that we can use our giftings to strengthen each other. 

* That it's okay to be discerning and picky about our real friends
   Jack has said before about friends,"I don't want to play with (so-and-so) because he/she is mean to me" or "I like (so-and-so) because he/she is nice to me."  I thought that was very mature of him, to have the discernment to know when someone else's personality/method of playing didn't encourage him, and the wisdom to know that it's okay to not be friends with people who don't encourage you. I sometimes feel obligated to try to be friends with everyone I meet...but not only is that impossible, but it's not beneficial for anyone.  Certain personalities blend better than others, and it's okay to be picky.  You do glean a lot from your friends, after all--better make sure they're worth gleaning from!  (And it goes without saying, also to make sure I'm the kind of friend who's encouraging to be around!)

* To be honest about feelings and emotions
   These little ones do not hide what they're feeling at all!  Sure, they need a little guidance and maturity to know how to better express what they're feeling, but I think it's very healthy and good that they express instead of bottling it up inside.  It's good to deal with issues when they happen instead of letting them get out of control.

* That God is involved and cares about the tiniest matters in our lives
   I love it when Jack involves Jesus in even the tiniest of situations throughout the day.  One of my favorites (which I may have shared previously), was when I told him a joke, and while laughing heartily he said, "Jesus in my heart is laughing!"  I love that image: God in our midst, laughing with us about a funny joke.  Jack is also very cognizant of and verbal about how Jesus will help us in various situations, like finding a lost toy or healing an owie, etc. 

I know these lists could be endless--I'd love to hear what your children teach you, too!

A Happy, Harried Day

We decided to tackle a shopping trip today, to the main souk (market) in downtown Amman.  It's less of a "souk" in the sense of open-air market and more of a centralized shopping area with tons of tiny shops all crammed back to back over several streets.  The shops seem to be organized by items sold: there's a street of scarves, a street of clothes, a street of toys, a street of mechanical needs, etc.  The main goal was to find the street of fabric shops...we did not find a whole street lined with said shops, but we did find several within a close vicinity, and got some beautiful prints (well, we think so, at least!).  I'm excited to delve into these projects when I get home!  I was hoping for a few more Middle-Eastern prints, but the ones available were...well, kind of ugly.  Oh well.  I'm happy with what we came away with. 

sheer fabric...perhaps matching skirts/dresses for me and Fia?

sheer fabric...an undecided something for Fia

turquoise seems to be a popular color here, and I love how they use it; this is not quite what I had in mind, but I'll use it!

The fabric store shopkeepers were all middle-aged men, which was funny but not out of place here, and added to the fun experience of buying fabric in another country.

We also happened across an amazing little store called "City Rose Souvenirs"...wish I would have thought to bring the camera, because the store itself was a delight to the eyes.  And the prices were so reasonable!  We found a trove of treasures from our "Jordan wish list" there, and had them all piled up at the front counter, ready to pay...when we realized to our horror that the money we thought we had brought was not, in fact, anywhere to be found.  As we were scrambling for what to do, we asked if they could hold it all for us while we went to get our money and come back.  It was extra confusing because our day was already jam-packed and there really was no time for coming back.  They counter-offered that we should just take it all with us, and come back to pay later.  No matter how many times this happens, it always takes me by surprise--it's so trusting!  We offered to just leave it all there until we came back, or to give them the money we did have, or to leave our phone number, but they refused it all and insisted that we just take our purchases and pay later.  Amazing!

my favorite buy: it's a hanging candle-lamp

isn't is gorgeous?  and so reasonably priced!

It took us 2 hours to wind our way out of downtown, a combined issue of terrible traffic and getting lost.  For some reason, we can never seem to find our way out of what I've come to think of as "the black hole" (city center).  And then I thought, it was extra trusting of those shopkeepers to have such faith in us that we could even find their shop again!  Maybe they thought of that after we left, as they did seem happy (surprised, even?) to see me again.  But thanks be to God, I did; and even more thanks to God (and the shopkeeper's directions), I found my way out in about 5 minutes! 

The days here have been over 100F lately--sweltering!  So today we had a refreshing invitation from some friends who work at the US Embassy in the swanky part of town to come swim with them at the embassy pool.  The embassy is like a fortress, or a town to itself, and everything inside is kept up really nicely.  After a harried (though good) day, soaked with sweat, it was delightful to dip into the refreshing water and just float awhile. 

Lost for Words

Yesterday, we had a wonderful time with friends touring around the Madaba Plains sites.  But, it's been an exhausting few days, and I'm tired and at a loss for words, so here's a picture summary of our day:

nothing like potty training on an ancient potty!

looks like as good a spot as any to set up a bed!

koubbe

fried halloumi cheese

pita so fresh, it's still puffy

holes in a bench + Jack's creative mind

tea at the Madaba museum

a little exploration of tomb-caves

Jack's response to "Show me your cutest face!"

a poor cow in need of a good milking

the boy captured how we all felt

Respect

I have noticed with curiosity while being here how people with seemingly very different values become friends and socialize together.  As an example: out and about, you will see women together, some of whom are wearing full burka and hijab, others in more "revealing" Western clothing (like a t-shirt with knee-length skirt) and hair down.  I always silently wondered how they happened to be of the same social group.

Not all of the fellows at ACOR are into archaeology...some of them are social researchers in various fields.  One of these fellows is doing research on Arab-American youth who are sent back to their Middle Eastern homelands for school or enculturation.  In talking with these young people, this fellow researcher told me, what is interesting is that they have experienced a different set of values in their Arab homelands than they have in America:  A general respect for all people is encouraged, regardless of how someone may be different from you.  This respect eliminates cliques and bridges wildly differing people.  Everyone is simply friends (or friendly) to everyone.  I have experienced this friendliness as well, but I was amazed that the teens she has interviewed have not experienced cliques in their schools, which are absolutely inescapable in the States.  There, everyone wants to seal themselves up in a bubble with the people who are just like them; I guess it's more comfortable to us to be surrounded by those who dress and talk and believe as we do.

Cliques are no fun.

But the down side to that kind of congregating and labeling behavior is that always, inevitably, there are many who don't fit neatly into the "bubbles of normalcy" that we create, and are left feeling unacceptable, shunned, outcast, with nowhere to belong...And those who do belong tend to become what their bubble dictates they should be; they are bound by their label rather than free to be themself.

My own natural tendency is to seal myself up in a comfortable bubble with those who are just like me.  It makes me feel secure in myself and in the world; it makes me feel stable and like all is well, and also like I myself am "normal."  But, having been forced out of that in various situations (including our time here in Jordan), I'm realizing what an amazing gift it is to befriend people who are wildly different from me, and so to see the world through a new set of eyes.  I have often felt myself on the outside of a clique, I have felt that un-belonging--so how amazing would it be if there were no boundaries on who you could and couldn't befriend?  Or should I say, would and wouldn't befriend?

unlikely friends

It would be so freeing, and so enriching!  Respect is a beautiful thing.