You DO, Actually, Have a Choice!

There was a point in the day, today, when our 3-year-old son was resisting following instruction, and his daddy applied pressure...but instead of submitting to the pressure, our son responded a fair bit self-assuredly:

"Well, actually, I have a choice."

We were so caught off guard, and so surprised by this response, that all we really did was look at each other with shocked grins while trying to ward off the laughter threatening to erupt!

It's true--what could we say?  He does have a choice.  We just weren't prepared for him to realize that yet.

So, after the shock-and-awe faded a bit, I got to thinking how we should handle such a situation, or how to turn this sort of time into a teachable moment.   But really, Jack's words resonated deeply within myself...How often do I dislike something my Father is asking me to do, and resist, and declare proudly, "Well, actually, I have a choice."

Of course, we all want to be independent and not merely follow another's bidding.  We all want to think we possess unshakable wisdom.  We all want to exercise our free will--and rightly so, since we were created to do so!  It's just that, I usually come to regret acting on my own choices...and perhaps the truest form of wisdom is following one who is wiser?

 After some thought, I decided that perhaps the best thing to say to Jack after that sort of declaration is something like: "You're right--you do have a choice.  But there are consequences for your choices, so please choose wisely."  I felt a little sheepish, since I felt I was saying it more to myself than to him.  I do love it when God uses my little children to teach me big lessons!

Chasing Opportunity

An opportunity has recently presented itself...An opportunity which may very well turn out to be wildly beneficial to us.  But which may, also, not. 

I'm being vague on purpose.  With my sincerest apologies.

The opportunity to which I refer is something that seems, to our logical minds, in our current situation, to be necessary and wise; but we also clearly see how it could be convincingly argued to the contrary.  We are diligently praying for God's wisdom, and praying equally earnestly that we have the clarity of spirit to discern His wisdom, because what we're presented with would feel (i.e., not be in actuality, merely a temporary soothing) like one step closer to the fulfillment of the deep longings of our hearts (and sometimes that clouds our minds).

This is not something that we can control by our own decisions, however, and so we continue to wait on God and see what He will bring about.  Many impossible-seeming events must happen between our current state and this opportunity becoming reality.  Opportunities are exciting, but only God can bring them to fruition, and we wait expectantly to see how He will choose to provide.  Perhaps, at times, too expectantly!

We welcome and thank you in advance for your prayers on our behalf in this--albeit vague--matter!   

Wisdom from Wee Ones

I love being a mommy, and I take very seriously my responsibility to teach and train my children.  But sometimes, it seems like they teach me more than I teach them!  It's a beautiful system, this family business.  Here is some of the wisdom my little ones have all figured out (and I hope they never lose it!):

* To love unreservedly, and forgive readily
   These sweet children love through thick and thin, and aren't afraid or ashamed to show their affection whenever it occurs to them.  They show no prejudice in their love, and see value in everyone.  They are quick to forgive, when an apology is sincere (or even just because). 

* To embrace life
   Oh, to be a kid again, and get caught up in the current of life, instead of the slough of "responsibility" that burdens us as adults...Children just seem to know how to embrace the joy of life, and to find joy in unexpected places, which is something we adults (wrongly) sacrifice under the pretense of being more--umm--responsible.

This is "emptying the water out" of Jack's boots, haha.

* To not be limited by fear
   I am amazed, constantly, at how unafraid my kids are!  Whether it's making new friends or asking kids we don't know to share a toy or jumping off a high precipice, they face new and challenging situations as if they're exhilarating opportunities. They especially seem to have no concept of fearing what other people think, which is HUGE!

Jack will jump off anything, even a 7-ft-high jungle gym!

Safita's favorite thing is jumping into water, and swimming in water over her head.  These guys are fearless!

* To play & be silly
   Sometimes, it's really good for the soul to just goof off and do nothing but paint your hair blue, make silly faces, and laugh about funny noises!  I'm convinced that silliness is more than just silliness--it's healing and rejuvenating!

* To approach problems as a game rather than an annoyance
   Whenever they're faced with a problem, their first reaction is to find a solution; and if the solution can be a game, all the better.

* To dance, whenever you hear music of any kind
   Songs on the radio, cell phone ringtones, advertising jingles...all deserve a peppy little jig!  It adds a sparkle of fun to sometimes otherwise dull moments.

* To treat everyone in the world like they are dear friends
   This is Safita's forte.  Wherever we are, and almost whatever her mood, she will wave and say hi, smile, and blow kisses to everyone we see.  She'll interact with strangers like they're a most beloved family member, and just make people feel special and loved.  She definitely leaves a trail of people swooning over her adorable friendliness!  She definitely convicts me in this regard, because I tend to just mind my own business and avoid people I don't know; but her friendliness seems to strike a (perhaps subconscious) longing in the people we meet from day to day--a longing to be in community, to treat all people like our neighbors, to be love to everyone we see...

Safita, showing deep affection for cousins we barely ever see (sadly)!

* To not judge people based on petty things, and to assume the best of people
   I think this is just true of kid nature--they haven't learned to judge yet.  They make observations about the people and things they see, but don't make value judgments about it.  I hope we can encourage them in that, and not teach them otherwise.

* To overlook differences--and even appreciate them!
   I love how the cousins on both sides love playing with each other, regardless of huge age gaps. They're all interested in different things and are at different stages in their lives, but somehow, they always find a common ground for appreciating each other and having fun together.  It's very sweet. In my own experience, too, when I've opened myself to learn from people different from me, I always learn valuable lessons and am deepened as a person.  It seems, God made us different for a reason, and maybe the point of community is to be around all different kinds of people (instead of a handful of people just like us) so that we can use our giftings to strengthen each other. 

* That it's okay to be discerning and picky about our real friends
   Jack has said before about friends,"I don't want to play with (so-and-so) because he/she is mean to me" or "I like (so-and-so) because he/she is nice to me."  I thought that was very mature of him, to have the discernment to know when someone else's personality/method of playing didn't encourage him, and the wisdom to know that it's okay to not be friends with people who don't encourage you. I sometimes feel obligated to try to be friends with everyone I meet...but not only is that impossible, but it's not beneficial for anyone.  Certain personalities blend better than others, and it's okay to be picky.  You do glean a lot from your friends, after all--better make sure they're worth gleaning from!  (And it goes without saying, also to make sure I'm the kind of friend who's encouraging to be around!)

* To be honest about feelings and emotions
   These little ones do not hide what they're feeling at all!  Sure, they need a little guidance and maturity to know how to better express what they're feeling, but I think it's very healthy and good that they express instead of bottling it up inside.  It's good to deal with issues when they happen instead of letting them get out of control.

* That God is involved and cares about the tiniest matters in our lives
   I love it when Jack involves Jesus in even the tiniest of situations throughout the day.  One of my favorites (which I may have shared previously), was when I told him a joke, and while laughing heartily he said, "Jesus in my heart is laughing!"  I love that image: God in our midst, laughing with us about a funny joke.  Jack is also very cognizant of and verbal about how Jesus will help us in various situations, like finding a lost toy or healing an owie, etc. 

I know these lists could be endless--I'd love to hear what your children teach you, too!